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This morning I decided to walk to the bank (less than a mile away) before work. I allowed myself 40 minutes, plenty of time, or so I thought. I got there in 10 minutes, but waited in line for more than 25 minutes. So I had to sprint home or be late for work. On the way home, I stepped in a fresh mound of dog poo, got caught in the rain, and felt like I was going to have a heart attack. I hadn't eaten anything yet because I was still grossed out from last night ( I will explain why in the next paragraph). So when I got home, I threw my old, smelly kangaroo shoes--now full of poo that wouldn't come off after I wiped my feet on the grass a few times--into the trash, ran upstairs, changed my socks and shirt, ran back downstairs, popped two waffles into the toaster oven, and when the buzzer beeped I wrapped the waffles in paper towels and ran out the door, still sweating from my run. I ate my plain soggy waffles in the car, not knowing whether they were soggy from the rain or from not enough toasting, and miraculously I made it to work early, heart still pounding.
Last night my heart was pounding for other reasons. I found creepy crawlies in a box of dry couscous that I had planned on cooking to bring for lunch today. At first I thought I was hallucinating when I saw the couscous literally swirling around the measuring cup like a little tornado. Freaked out, I dropped the cup, then picked it back up with a bag on my hand as a make-shift glove, and threw it into the trash can. Chad was not home, but Alec and Amy were here. I heard Alec's door open (I'm sure they heard my screams) so I hollered his name and told him what happened. To my surprise, Amy said she would take out the trash for me, which upped her to rock star status, in my eyes. I walked outside with her to the trash cans, then cleaned up the rest of the kitchen. I decided to bring a can of soup for lunch today. This definitely has the potential to become an eating disorder, one based on a phobia that has haunted me since childhood. One time when I was little I found maggots in an orange I was eating. I never ate an orange again until this year, at least 20 years later. I still remember my mom sticking her finger down my throat, and seeing what looked like spaghettios in the toilet after I threw up. It took years for me to be able to eat rice or spaghetti, and even now I only eat certain shapes of pasta.
I'm finally feeling better and now I'm just regular, allergy-congested. I realize now that my highly-pigmented eye shadows, purchased from Japan on ebay, may have been a contributing factor to my congestion, since for the past week or so I had been wearing the bright blue eyeshadow as eye liner and consequently was finding strings of bright blue snot in my tissues after blowing my nose. It took me a week to make the connection.
On Saturday night Chad and I met Jill, Karla, Alec and Amy at Fergies for Chang Chang's show. John gave us awesome Chang Chang tee-shirts for free and brought a mechanical life-size pony-robot with him to the pub. It was creepy yet neat. There was this hippy-looking guy with dreads and birkenstocks hanging out there, and surprisingly he was the singer (I use the word loosely) of this screaming metal type band that went on first. He was barefoot, shirtless, and resembled and oversized midget. We did not stay for the whole show.
On Sunday I saw my dog for the first time in a few weeks, and watched The Office at my parents' house after work.
Today is my day off and so far I spent most of it cleaning the bathroom and doing laundry, and checking my neglected email accounts. Fun!
The past few days have been sunny and gorgeous. Since it's my day off, the weather has decided to cool off and threaten rain.
I've had a sore throat and laryngitis since Sunday. Working 12 hours on Monday and 6 hours on Tuesday hasn't helped at all. Talking to people all day at work was a real treat. I finally called out sick today to give my voice a rest. I've been eating nothing but healthy food since passover and have never felt so sick in my life. I feel like I'm screaming just so people can hear my froggy voice.
Last night I actually had to leave the Of Montreal concert early because I felt so horrible. Chad had hurt his back earlier and was in a lot of pain anyway, but I still felt bad about leaving. What we saw of the show was really awesome. But the mixture of too much medicine and a crowd of so many people talking, jumping, laughing, dancing, combined with the bright, flashing, seizure-inducing lights and loud music made me feel like I was going crazy. We had to leave before I passed out or punched someone. I hate crowds. Earlier I had suggested we drive vs. taking the train and having to wait around. Unfortunately we could not find parking anywhere for a long time, and by the time we found a spot it began to pour. We ended up walking in the cold rain with wet, soggy shoes to Yakitori Boy. I drank copious amounts of green tea, we shared salmon, various rolls, and waited and waited and waited for the waitress to bring my rolls, which took so long that we cancelled the order in favor of another quick salad, and then off to see Of Montreal at the Troc, the outside of which was surrounded by smokers on all sides. My nose burned all night long despite breathing through my scarf.
Yesterday Danielle and I went shopping for my bridesmaid dress. Danielle had already purchased the flowers, so I had to order any dress in chocolate brown. I'm lucky Danielle let me choose which one I liked, because there were so many fugly dresses there. I tried on at least 10 of them in all different sizes, none of which fit me properly. Desperate, we found some "junior" (little kids) dresses, but they were too small in the chest, which was a boost to my ego (hehe) but not to my wallet. The only "grown up" dress that fit me (between a size 0 and a 2) costs $165, but it's really pretty and fits like a glove, and it's the one that Danielle and I both liked. I'll probably make something else out of it after Danielle and Matt get married. After that, I went to the mall to eat lunch (spicy mexican food to clear up my sinuses) and look for jeans (no luck), then grabbed more clothes and shoes from my apartment, then finally home to PA.
I stayed in bed until noon today. Of course I got up early at first to call out sick, but slept pretty well after that. I dreamed that I could breathe underwater. I had this ridiculous grin on my face (with teeth!) and I kept spinning and spinning and looking up toward the sky. I was in a swimming pool of some kind. I continued for what seemed like hours. Maybe I was being a real frog-girl.
I have been so congested the last few days, despite eating only healthy foods. Last night I dreamed I ordered 6 desserts at a restaurant with a friend, so I guess in dreams I still like junk food.
Work has been great the last few days. I've never seen so much pubic hair (bikini waxes) in my entire life, but I've been making commission and yesterday I made $250 including tips.
On Wednesday Chad and I went to a real Tai chi class. At first I was thinking "what the f is the teacher doing, I am never going to last the whole hour." But then she slowed down and we basically just copied her movements. I was already really sore from my ballet DVD. I'm glad we went, it was really fun. Next Wednesday we're going to see Of Montreal, one of my favorite bands.
We met Olivia, Toby and Vicki's new baby girl the other night. At one point she was sleeping and made this really disturbed frownie face. "Awww, she must be having a nightmare," I had said. But then she let out this ginormous fart. It was so funny. She is also sprayed pee everywhere while Vicki was changing her. Olivia is really cute though.
The other night I had the sound that yoshi (from super nintendo) makes in my head. I made the noise while Chad was putting Curb your Enthusiam on. A second later, Larry (on the show) sat down to dinner with a man named Yoshi. Weird. I experience synchronicity all the time. In my dream the other night I was looking at a blog called ocular spectacular (not sure if the blog exists in real life), and when I woke up I emailed Toby and suggested we give that name to our future band. Toby googled it and it turns out to be an album by MGMT, a band I like but never knew the name of their album.
I'm doing to do buns of steel and go to the store.
I had some crazy dreams last night. I dreamed I worked at a brothel, and I was sitting at a table eating raisins (which I hate) with my old dance teacher's mother (she looked kind of like a hooker, hehe) and playing with a mangy-looking cat (I also don't like cats). Eventually I looked down at my hands and realized I hate raisins. I woke up. The other night I had strange dreams, too. First I was worried about being late for work, and I was speeding, and a black car was about hit me head on, so I drove off the edge of a cliff into water, and my car turned into a boat and got me to work, but when I got there I couldn't find the place to clock in, and I stuffed money into a computer as a man asked me where the money was. I made some calls on my cell phone to my mom and Chad to tell them what happened. Then a lady with really creepy ears (like Gollum from The Lord of the Rings ears) was asking me (at a pool party) if I did ear candling at work. I told her no because it is illegal (that is true), although we did the service at school. Then I was home, and the toilet was made of multi-colored legos, and a baby cradle was beside it. "What the F is this?" I asked Chad, who blamed it on Alec.
Yesterday:
Brunch: wheat toast, boiled egg, oatmeal with flax and raw cacao, a banana
(status: not congested)
Snack: peanut butter and jelly on wheat bread (congested)
Dinner: homemade pizza (no cheese), salad (a little congested)
Snack: homemade smoothie (not congested, nose a little runny)
Today was the first time that I wasn't really congested when I woke up. And I did not sound like an old lady upon speaking. Usually when I say something after just waking up, I sound like I'm 100 years old (probably due to all the phlegm in my throat).
It's been a busy couple of weeks. Aside from working (which I am thoroughly enjoying), I am staying occupied by finding my way around PA, doing a puzzle (exciting, I know) and doing exercise videos at the house. On Tuesday Chad and I saw Death Cab for Cutie at the Tower. They were awesome. Before the concert even started, several drunk people were dragged away by friends and security. Chad and I wondered where they put them once they were outside. Is there some special "drunk people room" in the Tower perhaps? The next day I was still wondering what happened to the drunk man, who looked like he belonged at a Crosby Stills and Nash Concert, not at the Death Cab show. Maybe he was one of the band member's Dads or something. The Tower is a gorgeous venue, with intricate crown molding all over the ceiling. It was the first time I ever craved a beer in my life, but I didn't want to spend the whole concert in the bathroom, so I refrained.
On Wednesday I had my first Passover experience. It was fun and interesting. There's even a song! I still have "let my people go" in my head. First we read all about Passover in these books that have been in Chad's family since the 80's. We had to drink red wine every so often, so I kept pouring mine into another glass, but Simon kept refilling it. Next year I'll just say I'm allergic. I ate a lot of Matzo (no gefelte fish for me) and some matzo ball soup. Everything I didn't like I just piled onto Chad's plate. By the end of the night, he was really full and I was chowing down on dessert. I had been staring at the fruit and macaroons and cake all night long.
On Friday after work we went to my friend Patrick's gallery exhibition at the Tuscan Cafe in Philly. My parents came too. It was neat. I drove there all by myself, but Chad parked for me :) I'm okay with living in PA, but I usually take the train to Philly and get nervous driving there because of all the cars, bikes, and people everywhere. Patrick should feel pretty darn special. Anyway, the photographs were gorgeous, and it was good catching up with Patrick, who is now married. Helena might have been a paid actress since she did not respond to Mrs. Esmonde ;) Anyway, Patrick's work can be seen here
http://www.esmondephotography.com/
Chad and I went to his friend Chris's house on Saturday after work. The house was amazing, literally the coolest place I have ever seen. It used to be a barn, and they kept all the old woodwork, ladders, and stone walls in place. There were secret passages! It was fun to mingle with everyone, and I especially enjoyed playing catch with the mini jack (half min-pin, half jack russel) that lived there.
On Easter we went to my old apartment and picked up another load of my stuff, then went to Chad's sister Lisa's place for about an hour. Chad's nephew Aiden had covered himself in temporary tattoos (from the Easter bunny), including on his butt. Lisa said she drew the line when he wanted to put one on his wang :) We met my parents and Grandmom at Bob Evans for dinner, then went back to my parents house. Minnie was extremely happy to see us. We watched Beverly Hills Chihuahua (something to make my Grandmom laugh), which was cute and ridiculous. Chad took a nap while the movie was on. The songs made it even more Cheesey (one male chihuahua was thinking "I can be your hero baby" to the main character, a female chihuahua, at one point). My mom got Chad a basil plant for Easter, and she got me some really awesome over the door hooks shaped like little monkeys. Later we watched "Lars and the Real Girl" with Alec. It was a great movie, and better than I thought it would be.
I had the day off today so Chad took the day off too. It's a hoodie day, not too cold out, so we rode bikes to Cinema 16:9, then went to Pei Wei for lunch. As usual, we ended up trading meals, but this time Chad didn't like his that much instead of me not liking mine that much. We went hiking at Ridley State Park. I peed there in the woods several times. We skipped rocks and walked on the unpaved trails. We went to Trader Joe's on the way home.
I guess I should mention that I am in the process of changing my eating habits. I used to be a health nut, up until 2001 when I moved back to NJ from Florida. "I'm thin, I can eat whatever I want" I had figured, but then my skin started to break out for the first time in my life, and I was 22 years old, not a teenager. I go on health kicks every now and then, and hopefully this time it is permanent. I'm just tired of feeling like a giant phlegmy zit ball all the time. I get congested everytime I eat, and I break out from sugar, alcohol, spicy food, you name it. I gave up dairy a long time ago, which was easy because I'm not a fan of it, although I do occassionally crave cheese. Giving up dairy has helped tremendously, but my biggest downfall and craving is sugar. When I first moved in with Chad, my skin was starting to clear up, my pants became loose, etc. But wine and sweets at Passover made my face breakout, and I am tired of it. I am a skin care specialist for crying outloud, it is time to start acting like it. I might occassionally post what I eat just to keep track of what makes me congested and what seems to break me out.
Today:
breakfast: homemade gluten-free pancakes with fruit and almonds (status: congested)
Lunch: brown rice, shrimp, and vegetables with honey sauce, Chai tea, and half of an all natural chocolate chip cookie, a few fortune cookies (status: not congested)
Snack: half of a green smoothie from Trader Joe's (status: a little congested, nothing too uncomfortable)
Snack: a banana (status: bananas definitely make me congested)
Today I had my first Frisbee Golf experience. Apparently it is a really big deal and not something Chad and his friends made up as I thought before. Tyler park was packed due to a tournament. Tons of people were there with their dogs, throwing colorful disks everywhere. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Matt and Alexa brough their dog Lulu, a pitbull and basset hound mix--a result of dog rape perhaps?. She was cute and well-behaved and not at all scary. Jason was there (he is scary-- haha), and so alcohol was involved, but only for Chad, Matt, Jason, and Mark. It was a first time for Alexa and me, so they didn't make us drink if we scored lowest.
Jason brought a thermos full of a green mystery liquid, which smelled like red bull and melted popsicles. I had the feeling urine might have been a secret ingredient, but Matt was not about to divulge this. Whoever got the lowest score at each hole had to drink from it. Chad had to drink once or twice. He did not get drunk, sick, or throw up from it. I'm not competative when it comes to things I know I suck at, so I was thrilled to beat Jason (who always picks on me and is extremely competative) twice. By 4pm we were all starving and exhausted. It took us a few hours to finish 9 holes because of the tournament and because we took a break to search for Matt's missing disk. We kicked leaves around and hiked around the woods, but the disk's whereabouts are still unknown. We did see a small snake. Chad and I left and walked back to the car.
I slept all the way home, and I remember dreaming that I told someone I felt like I was inside a cardboard box and laughing about it. Late lunch/dinner time came and Chad and I sat outside, shivering and eating bean burgers on the front porch. Then we watched The Dark Crystal with Alec and Amy. This time Alec stayed awake and Chad fell asleep.
The last time I saw the Dark Crystal I was four years old. That is some scary stuff for anybody, let alone a four year old. The animation, effects, and puppetry in that movie are amazing, it is not your typical crappy claymation (which I also enjoy), and there is actually a plot! A familiar plot, but a plot nonetheless. And I just discovered after googling the movie, looking for a jpeg image to post here, that there is a sequel!
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